So, you start talking to this person you’ve just met and try to come up with
some topic for conversation. Oh yeah, what’s that curious accent all about? So
you drop the question. “Where are you from?” is a great way of getting
a person to start a mutually enriching cultural exchange, right? Wrong. Let me
tell you why. Granted, exchange students, immigrants, and other people who may, for
whatever reason, have come to your country don’t expect to be taken for locals.
They are, most likely, well aware of their accent, different appearance or
whatever else may distinguish them from the natives. Perhaps, they even cherish
your interest in their culture and the chance to share it with you. Still,
“Where are you from?” could make your international buddy feel not engaged, but
alienated.
Personally, I can’t help cringing at the inevitable question. While I do
recognize and appreciate the person’s friendliness and interest, I can’t help
thinking, “Is that the first thing people notice about me?” It is not without
hesitation that I take this, genuinely well-meant, opportunity to start a
cultural exchange. While I’m aware of my “foreignness,” I’d like to think
there’s more to me than coming from a different country, however intriguing
that aspect may look. Not to mention the fact that, more often than not, the “cultural exchange”
stops at “Oh, that’s cool” because my buddy doesn’t really know what to say.
Or, even better, they give me the well-meant, but indefinitely vague question
“So what’s it like?”
I’m not trying to advise anyone against asking where an apparently non-local
person is from. But perhaps it shouldn’t be the first question that comes out
of your mouth. Try something less personal instead.
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| WHEN SOMEBODY ASK ME "WHERW YOU WORKING NOW??????? I JUST SAID " I WORKING WITH GOVERNMENT STAFF IN PUTRAJAYA ......." AND WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT????.......OH YES, GOVERNMENT STAFF ...... OF COURSE LOW CLASS GROUP !!!!! ..... |
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| SO WHEN SOMEBODY ASK ME WHERE YOU COME FROM ?????? I COME FROM HERE BEUTIFULL LAKES IN HULU LANGAT SELANGOR ...... |
Why I’m not on Facebook (anymore)
Some co-workers told me they found my blog while trying to find me on
Facebook. Well, it is official: I am not on Facebook. Any namesake you find is
a different person.Just to clarify: it’s not a “going-against-the flow” attitude or some sort
of statement. I had a Facebook profile for 3 years and am still on a Malaysian expatriate social network. I agree with those of you will say
Facebook is a great way to keep in touch with far-away friends and share news
and photos easily. The reason I left Facebook is personal, and I’ll try to
explain it in this post.
In a nutshell, I want to have the luxury of being contacted exclusively by
people who care enough to make an effort to get in touch. In other words, would
you remember my birthday if the website calendar hadn’t reminded you, would you
ask me how I was if you hadn’t read my latest update and would you make a point
of sharing your news/pictures with me if they didn’t show up on everyone’s wall
at a click of the mouse? Too demanding, you say? Perhaps. That’s why I call
friends of this quality a luxury.
If you’ve as much as written an email, a text or an instant message to me,
you know that I am frequently online and
am fairly good at answering incoming correspondence. Which means there are
effective ways of getting in touch with me, besides social networking… if you
want to. Once again, I am not trying to condemn social networking in general or
Facebook in particular. It’s just that at this point in my life, it’s not
something I feel I need. But, yes, I am officially alive and accessible via all
sorts of media, so if you landed on this page while looking for my Facebook
page, feel free to drop me a line.
